1. Anonymous said: i miss your shit on my dash, where are you?

    I’m too old to keep up with you youngins on the tumblrs. I’ll try to do my best just for you, anonymous.

    8 months ago  /  0 notes

  2. i guess i need to lose half of my body weight in order to be loved.

    fuck.

    10 months ago  /  0 notes

  3. this guy i know wants me to suck his dick because his girlfriend won’t.

    this guy i know wants me to suck his dick because his girlfriend won’t.

    11 months ago  /  2 notes

  4. princeofhopefulness:

    deodrant:

    *tries to talk*

    *gets ignored*

    “you should talk more!”

    (via iwouldliketobutteryourmuffin)

    1 year ago  /  767,923 notes

  5. liartownusa:

Apple Cabin Foods No.7

    liartownusa:

    Apple Cabin Foods No.7

    1 year ago  /  1,042 notes  /  Source: liartownusa

  6. catversushuman:

Maybe it’s why my cat drools on me when she sleeps.

    catversushuman:

    Maybe it’s why my cat drools on me when she sleeps.

    1 year ago  /  15,464 notes  /  Source: catversushuman

  7. shitfestcomic:

#116
That would make a good band name.

    shitfestcomic:

    #116

    That would make a good band name.

    1 year ago  /  167 notes  /  Source: shitfestcomic

  8. toothpastecomics:

Nice guys. From Toothpaste For Dinner.

    toothpastecomics:

    Nice guys. From Toothpaste For Dinner.

    1 year ago  /  533 notes  /  Source: toothpastecomics

  9. mondoodoo:

    so i was looking up off bug spray ads and i was expecting to see some lady on a lawn chair with a bottle of bug spray but instead i saw

    image

    then i came across this gem

    image

    and this last one was pure gold

    image

    god bless you off bug spray

    (via iwouldliketobutteryourmuffin)

    1 year ago  /  175,029 notes  /  Source: missedea

  10. toothpastecomics:

Universal drinking game. From Toothpaste For Dinner.

    toothpastecomics:

    Universal drinking game. From Toothpaste For Dinner.

    1 year ago  /  1,073 notes  /  Source: toothpastecomics